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Old 02-17-2009
 
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United States Luther Stark
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Default Re: Attraction - Subjective or Re-Framing?

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Now what I find faschinating is if there is a universal beauty or if our genes and culture create an image of beauty.
I would have a hard to accepting the idea of a "universal" beauty. The word strikes me as inherently subjective.

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However my hypothesis is that inside our core we seek a beautiful woman without flaws, but due to the fact that many can't get such a woman one starts distorting the image.
I also have a difficult time believing that our 'core' nature is to seek out women on the primary basis of physical attractiveness. It seems to me that females have alot more to offer than the appearance of their bodies.

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Some people like morbitly obese women or women who are missing a limb, Why is this?
My instinct here is that these people don't find people who have these faults especially physically attractive. Rather, they are attracted to people who have physical flaws for reasons that, again, are not related to physical beauty. For example, a person may be insecure about their weight and they may find that being attracted to a person who is overweight allows them to get overcome their insecurities.

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The more a man fails at attracting women the more flawed women he will seek.
I think this is similar to my above point. But we shouldn't make hte mistake of thinking that this pattern of behavior is either necessary or adapative. Rather, it strikes me as avoidable and frankly maladaptive.

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Now what I find unhealthy about this attitude is that a person changes failure to success at the cost of being honest to himself and stops himself from getting what he truly seeks.
Again, I think my above point agrees with this conclusion, although I would be careful not to infer what exactly it is that the person 'truely seeks'.
 

Last edited by Luther Stark; 02-17-2009 at 04:42 AM.
 

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